Move over Paul Gilbert, Yngwie Malmsteen, Herman Li and all other shred Gods. You have been replaced by a dude from Colorado with the most unassuming weedly-wee name ever: John Taylor.

That’s right, bow down before the mighty…John. OK, so it’s not the most metal moniker of all time, but the man knows how to play – fast!

According to Wired:

Thrashers, shredders, and heshers, lend me your tinnitus-damaged ears! The Great Question has been settled. The fastest guitar player alive is not Eddie Van Halen nor Yngwie Malmsteen nor that guy from Morbid Angel. Nope, it’s John Taylor, a 28-year-old music teacher in Westminster, Colorado, who last spring claimed the official Guinness-certified title by blazing through Rimsky-Korsakov’s “The Flight of the Bumblebee” at a fret-melting 600 beats per minute.

You can read the full report here, but in the meantime, just check out this video.

photo by Jamie Kripke